wow, i never thought you would do such a thing. i never thought, of all people, that you would resort to such actions. i can't believe that you are hurting yourself and others like this and that you are doing these things to yourself. it's hurting me to see you live like this. and i've tried to let you know that you do deserve better, that it's not healthy to live as you are living--because i love you and i really do believe you deserve better. you know it too.
life doesn't have to be like this. it doesn't have to be this messy, this messed up, this painful. you know that.
it's really hard not being able to help you in this situation, to just sit here and have to wait for you to realize that you should listen--to me, to your conscience, to everything and everyone telling you that this situation is not healthy. you need to get out.
i wish i could fix everything and save you. i wish i could be a hero for you. but, i can't. i can't do anything else. i just have to watch and wait--and pray. that you do listen. that people are inherently good. that God can and does come into situations like these.
that God is a redeeming God.
not only for your sake but for mine as well.
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